Saturday, September 7, 2013

Brewsky (Leash the Hounds)

"Why does it hurt?"

    While on a short hike recently we spent a nice stretch of time for a mile or so unexpectedly sharing the trail with a very friendly lost dog. First he came charging down the path, stopping briefly to say hello, and then disappearing for a while, before bounding back up the other way. He repeating this again and again, for ever-shortening intervals, until finally falling into place, tagging along beside us as we trundled along. Eventually we heard off ahead in the distance someone, presumably his owner, calling for him, and we shooed the dog - "Brewsky" according to his nametag - along and we turned ourselves around to head back down the trail. But not before overhearing him getting yelled at: “you TOTAL IDIOT!”
    Well… given the adage “There are no bad dogs… just bad owners” I beg to differ. In fact, we can instead credit Brewsky, while being a dog and therefore possessing comparatively (obvious exceptions aside) limited powers of reasoning, as being pretty damn intelligent. This became manifestly apparent after observing him occasionally yelping in pain, which after a couple of careful all-over examinations for injuries, revealed a shock collar that was administering electrical currents into his neck.
   So honestly one can’t really blame Brewsky for heading away in the completely opposite direction of the source of his agony, especially while his confused and frightened state was being compounding with random acts of cruelty. It reminded me of all the fucked-up people in this world who suffer as a result of barbarically ignorant parents who attempted to instill “love” and “respect” by perversely beating the shit out of their children. I would sincerely recommend counseling as to the wide range of options available for birth control.
    In short, if you haven’t invested enough time training your dog and therefore cannot keep them under verbal control at all times, then do NOT unleash them, especially on an Alaskan trail where there are very good odds at encountering wildlife such as porcupines and bears (both of which abound on this particular trail), to say nothing of other folks with their animals. Failing these basic, simple precautions means that you are probably not responsible enough to have a pet, period. And shame on anyone for thinking there are sadistic short-cuts like shocking pets into compliance with infantile expectations.

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